As I’ve gotten older I’ve learned how important my inner circle is. In your 30’s especially, the circle tends to get a little bit smaller. As friends begin to get married and start their families, or friends move to new places for jobs or career changes. It forces you to look at who’s around you. And if you’re smart, you’re making sure those people are adding value to your life. I’m in my 30s and single for reference and my inner circle consists of a small but powerful group of (mostly) women. From my sister who I’m fortunate to be close with, to a great group of girlfriends who are thankfully mostly single as well for my sanity, and my work friends. These people help to shape my life in the way I want it to look. Supportive, fun and inspiring.
But in addition to just friends, I think there are other people who should be in your life and part of your circle in your 30s. From a great aesthetician who you can trust to doctors and mentors. I really think no matter your age, this list is an important one to try to check off. But especially in your 30s as life paths begin to shift and health problems may begin to appear. I’m thankful I have everyone checked off on this list and feel confident in them all. I’ll be honest, it didn’t happen overnight. And I don’t think it ever does. Making friends, and good ones I might add, takes time and energy. Much like dating. But it’s worth the effort.
Like A Sister
Whether your actual sister, or someone who’s like a sister, this relationship is one of the most important ones to me. A sister is someone who you can have a big fight with and be just fine the next day. Someone who can tell you how it is, but also know when to sugarcoat it. The one who will totally bail you out of jail, literally and figuratively. I’m lucky to have an actual sister who I know will be there no matter what. And will always be honest and tell it to me how it is. This type of relationship can help ground you, bring you back down to reality and is always a good shoulder to lean on. I can’t imagine not having a sister and feel so lucky to not only have one but also have one that I’m close with.
A Mentor
No matter the industry that you’re in, it’s always important to have someone who can be your mentor. If it’s someone who’s more formally a mentor in that you meet with them once a month or someone in your life you just turn to for guidance when you need it, mentors are crucial. It’s best to have someone there who can provide insight, expertise and lay it out for you. Mentors can help provide you professional support that a work friend or regular friend may not be able to. If you need some networking tips, these can help and you just might find a mentor this way!
A Trusted Doctor
As a woman, having an OBGYN I can call and count on is an important part of a doctor-patient relationship. When a UTI strikes while on vacation, a well-trusted OBGYN will call in a prescription no questions asked. They should also be someone you can talk to about your sex life, mental health and well being. Now that many of my friends are beginning to start families, an OBGYN is even more important.
A Neighbor
I’ll never forget the time my building had an actual fire and my friend (and thankfully neighbor) called me to make sure everything was okay. I was not home at the time and my heart sunk. Pork was at home and I had no idea how bad the fire was or where it was within the building. For all I knew it was the floor above me and my entire unit was covered in water. My dear friend went to my apartment, walked up over a dozen flights of stairs to get Pork and bring her back down to safety. THESE are the types of neighbors (and friends) you need in your life. This event made me realize how important it is to have a trusted neighbor no matter what. Someone to have a spare key to your home in case of an emergency and someone to just keep tabs on you. PS this gem of a friend recently moved so now it’s time to make nice with the people on my floor.
A Beauty Expert
This may actually be several people if you ask me. I think women should have a hairstylist they can go to and trust wholeheartedly with their hair. But also someone who takes care of their skin. An aesthetician is such an important person to have to care for your skin as we age and as our skin care needs change. This may also mean a botox person or laser hair removal, or a plastic surgeon you trust. But this beauty circle should be professional, reputable and well trusted. Below are some of my favorites who I can recommend in the Atlanta area.
Aesthetician – Ryan at Beauty By Ryan
Plastic Surgeon – Dr. Rudderman
Hairstylist – Nichole Abad
Work Friends
There’s something about having a work family that just gets it that makes life that much better. Whether it’s getting through a tough project that they totally get and can help you through it or at least listen to you bitch and actually understand it. Work friends may not always last once you leave your job and move on to another one or another career. But the ones who do last job after job, year after year; those are the best kind of work friends. Having a group of people at your 9-5 to help support you and each other is key to getting through the mundane tasks, the challenges and the commute to the cubicle.
As someone who is self-employed now within a unique industry, it’s even more important to have a great circle. I’m so thankful for some of my close work friends. Although we may not work together in a traditional way, they’re the people who understand what it is I do everyday and can help answer questions, provide insight and be there to bitch about things. The girls I count on like Cathy, the #BloggersDoTravel gang and Lauren, all help to make this job feel a lot less isolating. They’re a shoulder to lean on when you’re confused, and also people who just get exactly what I’m talking about. And can also lead with some insight.
Non-Work Friends
Beyond your sister (or someone who’s like a sister) and work friends, it’s important to also have a group of good solid friends. Ones you can call up to grab lunch when you’re bored to ones who will bring over the ice cream and watch SATC reruns when your heart is broken. You don’t need a giant circle or a million different friends either. I’m a firm believer of quality over quantity. Look for friends who are trustworthy, positive and make you feel your best. Brownie points if they make great travel partners too! I’m so thankful for my little girl group that’s grown and developed over the years. But again, it’s different and nothing like my work friends or my sister. Variety is key! But these girls are an essential part of my sanity.
