Confessions is back! Send your confessions in at info@sickchirpse.com or DM us on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram. Everything we publish is 100% anonymous – just give an alias you’d like us to use.
Let’s go…
BRK
I had a best friend since I was young called Tai. We went through school together, EMT and fire academy. Did everything together he was my brother. So one night drunk we had a threesome with this girl and said girl told my wife who threatened to leave me and take our daughter if I ever see him again. I miss him terribly Tai if you’re reading this love you mate I wish things were different.
proctor
I told a homeless guy to have a good weekend and I’ve been torturing myself over how stupid that was ever since
mrright
The fit bartender at my local found me on facebook and messaged me. She got my full name off my credit card. Ended up taking her out and back to mine and shagged all night. Then she ghosted me and just treats me like a regular customer at the pub. Now I’m wondering how many other guys she’s pulled the same move with.
Night
I repeat things that I hear on the Joe Rogan podcast and everyone thinks I’m really smart and well read but the truth is I’m just parroting the stuff his guests say.
aimesbond
I told my girlfriend I’m getting her laser hair removal sessions for her bday. She got excited saying she would use them on her lips and cheeks. I suggested she use them on her bum hole as thats why I am buying them. She didn’t take it well.
Derex
I turned down a decent job opportunity and more pay because they test for drugs. I’m not ready to leave that life behind yet.
jak loomis
At uni once I was drunk and a girl I met that day walked me back to my accomodation, followed me into my room, wanted sex, I had no clue what was going on, and all I remember is clips of me banging her with a semi and putting in a pathetic performance. When I woke up she was getting dressed to leave and started saying how my dick was too small #metoo
messiluna
My girlfriendmy parents
123four
I really think that one day I’m going to spend all my money then kill myself.
yseth
Whenever I jizz too fast when wearing a condom I just keep composed and keep on pumping until my dick is a soft noodle, just to add a few seconds to an already disappointing performance.
kingkobra90
I have no idea what face to make during sex when the girl is on top of me. They look down at you all sexy like and I just don’t know how to look like I’m anything other than amazed a girl would want to bang me
cass w
I thought I was having a heart attack this morning. I’m 26. Pretty scary, not gonna lie. The other day I was also convinced I had ball cancer. So… yeah life’s going well.
bethshep
I once gave my boyfriend such an amazing blowjob that he pulled his calf muscle while cumming. He was limping for 2 days afterwards. Pretty proud of that one
[no name]
I’ve ruined 2 potentially long term relationships by waking up too often in their bed drenched in my own piss
justaguy
In Year 8 science I pronounced organism as ‘orgasm’ and the whole class laughed and I was embarrassed. To calm me down my teacher told me everyone would forget in 2 weeks. Well its been 15 years and I still remember. I still remember.
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[Send your confessions in at info@sickchirpse.com or on our social media pages – don’t worry, we keep them 100% anonymous! Just send an alias if you want us to use one).
See you next Friday!
