29 Really Dumb Kardashian Quotes

Kim Kardashian and company often say some really dumb stuff. Consider these quotes as an example.

Kim, After Suffering a Mishap While Pregnant…

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If labor’s worse than this, I’ll hang myself. I’ll literally take a knife and slit my throat.

Khloe, on Playing Golf…

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I could maybe hit it better if they were black balls. (Editor’s Note: This is the best quote in the history of ever.)

An Unexpected Connection…

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I am Armenian, so of course I am obsessed with laser hair removal. – Kim Kardashian

Kim, on Voting for Obama…

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He just seemed very firm about the change, and that’s, like, his motto.

Kim, on Going Under the Knife…

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I’ll have surgery at some point. I’ll do my boobs for sure. I’ll never do my butt. I mean, how would you sit down?

Kim, on Neutering her Dog…

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I don’t like big balls on a dog.

Worst. Thing. EVER.

7Worst. Thing. EVER.
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I hate when women wear the wrong foundation color. It might be the worst thing on the planet when they wear their makeup too light. – Kim Kardashian

Kim, on Treating Herself…

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I buy myself a gift every year, so this year I bought everything I wanted.

Kim to Khloe, During Hair Remove Process…

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You have a better looking vagina than I thought.

Kim, on Britney Spears…

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She said she loves me and she loves my butt and how she wants to be my lesbian lover. I mean, what do you say to that other than ‘No thanks?’ Actually, maybe I would do it for a million bucks.

Khloe, Following a Near Nip-Slip on The X Factor…

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I have a nipple obsession and personally love when women show their nipples; perhaps I was a member of a nudist colony in my last life.

Khloe, Giving Underwear Advice…

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Droopy balls? Buy briefs! A bra for your balls!

Khloe, Just Being Angry…

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F-ck me with a dildo if that’s what you think!

Khloe, to Kris Humphries…

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Do you know why I call you Frankie? Because you remind me of a glimpse of Frankenstein.

Khloe, on Her Mother’s New Hairdo…

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Your hair is, like, shorter than a vagina’s bush.

Khloe, Just Being… Honest?

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I’m Khloe. My sisters say I am a bitch.

Khloe, on Reggie Bush and Kim…

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I mean, I love the Bush and the Tush. Seriously, the Bush and the Tush, that was, like, iconic for me, I loved them. You can’t do much better than that.

Khloe, on Playing Parent…

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A lot of adults don’t think it’s their place to interfere with kids. I interfere all the time.

Khloe, Sounding Like Brick Tamland…

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Don’t go into the ocean while on your period because a shark is going to attack you.

Kris, on Her Best Friends…

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A girl never knows when she might need a couple of diamonds at ten in the morning.

Kris, Being Gross…

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Honey, anytime there’s balls involved, it’s my kind of game.

Kourtney, on Putting a Picke Up Her Butt…

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Have you ever put food up your ass? A pickle would be good.

Kourtney, on REALLY Loving Motherhood…

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I remember one day I was kissing Mason and he spit up in my mouth, and I loved it.

Kourtney, on Photographer Ashley Paige…

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I’m ready to shove a taco up her ass.

Kourtney, on Being Ravenous…

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I’m such a bitch when I’m hungry. Like, stone cold biatch.

Scott Disick, on Himself…

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When you think of the debonair, ridiculously good looking guy, you think of me.

Scott Disick, Still on Himself…

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All the haters are just jealous, so they’re trying to bring me down. I’m young, handsome, successful, wealthy. You could say I’m a role model – I’m the American dream!

Scott Disick, on… Guess Who?

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I’m like a Lord of something. I just don’t know what. I’m trying to figure it out …

Kim, on Being Pregnant…

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I was waiting for this amazing experience where I could just do whatever I want, eat whatever I want, feel great… and it just hasn’t been that way.

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