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- Beauty
And whose business is it anyway? Two writers get personal
Bear Grylls//Digital Spy
Body hair is having, shall we say, a bit of a moment. It may not be an everlasting trend but more and more celebs seem to be donning a bushy pit, most recently Girl's star Jemima Kirke on the red carpet (pictured above) at the CFDA Fashion Awards.
Our thoughts? Two of Red's editor's debate the topic.
'YES – IT'S A FORM OF CONTROL'
Extreme grooming is making men too demanding and women feel insecure, says Red’s beauty editor-at-large Rosie Green
Bear Grylls//Digital Spy
Is fur a feminist issue? I’m beginning to think so. Now that waxing is on the menu in every high-street salon, are we being made to feel unattractive, unhygienic, ungroomed if we are not plucked to the point of extinction?
Full disclosure: my bush is, well, bushy. Being a beauty editor, I should probably be sporting the Hollywood (nothing), a Brazilian (landing strip; nothing on the undercarriage), or at least a short back and sides. Truth is I go for the latter before a holiday; the rest of the time it gets the odd trim, followed by an emergency application of Veet if I’m required to be in a swimming pool at short notice.
I have had a Hollywood. I had it about 10 years ago when waxing gurus the J Sisters were the hottest things in NY. It was like the labour ward. You could hear people crying out in pain. But when I got home and looked in the mirror, I found the pain to pleasure ratio did not stack up. Not only did I look a lot wider without that triangle of hair, my skin was so red and bumpy, it was more Christmas turkey than object of desire. Not worth the discomfort in my book.
Now, none of this is to say I don’t enjoy being neat and tidy, especially on holiday. But, still, I don’t see why we should have to be bare down there to be attractive. Is it not a bit weird to want to look like a prepubescent girl? Cultural observers say that as porn saturates our society, so too does its influence on what looks desirable. ‘The trend toward women’s hairless genitals is definitely influenced by a porn aesthetic,’ says feminist author Naomi Wolf, whose new book Vagina: A New Biography (Virago, £12.99), explores female power and sexuality. Fellow US writer and journalist Michelle Goldberg agrees and says, ‘As women gain more social, economic, and political power, standards of beauty and grooming have been ratcheted up to oppressive levels to act as a new kind of control.’ Feminist thinkers argue that as society demands women go to greater lengths to fit into what is desirable (waxing, lasering, surgery...), they’ve got less time to focus on the more important things, like winning Nobel prizes or running countries.
It’s certainly true that for many of us, being perma-waxed is basically yet another failed thing on our to-do list. I am already berating myself for my greys and mummy tummy, now I can add bikini-line angst to that, as well. Why? Because some time in the last decade, take-it-all-off waxing has become pretty much a requirement. Which means, at a basic level, we are having to deny the reality of our bodies. We are being pressurised to modify them, sometimes permanently, to fit into society’s new expectations. Michelle Goldberg wonders where it will all stop? Her research shows an upsurge in cosmetic labiaplasty, with surgeons regularly being shown close-ups of porn stars for inspiration.
The sad truth is it’s not just twentysomething men that demand no hair down there. Many men in their thirties, forties and fifties now expect Brazilian-ed bits, too. This is borne out by novelist Imogen Edwards-Jones’ recent experience. She wrote on beauty website Get The Gloss that she hadn’t had a bikini wax for 20 years. When actor Tom Hollander (45) came face to, er, fanny with her while skinny dipping on holiday, he shouted, ‘Jesus Christ, have you completely given up?’ Hmm. So, is he a product of a porn-overloaded culture or a deluded body fascist who needs a reality check? In fairness to Tom, he probably just reflects a society where bald bits are ‘normal’.
But the good news is that just as designers, actresses and directors rebelled against the flashy glamour of the 1980s with 1990s grunge and non-conformist beauties, like Kate Moss, so I believe our faux-tan-and-teeth culture will swing towards a more natural aesthetic. Gone will be designer vaginas, turbo tits and vajazzling and in their place will be a nouvelle vague of real breasts and gasp... (moderately) furry fannies. And I, for one, will be right on trend.
'NO, IT'S JUST PERSONAL TASTE'
Lady gardening is not a political issue but simply a matter of personal preference, says Red’s beauty director Annabel Meggeson
Bear Grylls//Digital Spy
My recently divorced, forty something friend is telling me about an encounter she had at the weekend with a (much) younger man. It was all going well, she says, until they got to the critical stage and he refused to perform certain acts, because he ‘liked a clean plate’. ‘Oh my GOD!’ I spit, but while I’m outraged-by-proxy on the one hand, another part of me is inwardly consoling myself with the thought that at least this wouldn’t have happened to me. Because you could eat your dinner off my ‘plate’ (without getting anything stuck in your teeth).
I’ve been keeping my bikini line tidy since my late teens. In my mid-twenties, during a period of sexual awakening, I crossed the line and had it all off. As I recall, I’d decided to take the plunge with a Brazilian, but by the time I’d endured the pain and humiliation of hot wax on my labia and rectum, what was a little more on the pubic mound? The result made me feel cleaner, tidier and more confident about pushing the boundaries in bed.
Since then, intimate grooming has become part of my beauty routine and I don’t consider it any more or less political than shaving my armpits or dyeing my hair. Discussions in the office or with girlfriends suggest that we’re increasingly feeling a pressure to groom, that it’s expected not enjoyed and isn’t it outrageous that men under a certain age have never seen a grown woman with pubic hair. But I suspect that under our boy shorts and briefs, there’s a lot more variation than we think.
I also think, while there’ll always be the odd story like my friend’s, most men don’t care. It’s like the whole cellulite thing. Women worry about it, but a quick straw poll of men would soon reveal that it takes a lot more than a dimpled thigh or crop of pubic hair to stand between a man and his chance to have sex. You could even argue that the matter of bushes helps sort the wheat from the – sorry, I can’t resist – chuff. If a man objects to you on the (perceived) failings of your lady garden, you know he isn’t worth a look-in.
In the meantime, the women who opt for Brazilian and Hollywoods generally derive great pleasure from it, whether it’s from getting thrills in bed, being able to relax on holiday without worrying about what’s on show, or simply loving the look and feel – the way they might relish a pair of freshly threaded eyebrows or a great pedicure.
Perhaps the real problem is not the recourse to action itself, but the fact we talk about it so much. (Guilty as charged, obviously, but hear me out...) It took the feminist movement to establish that a more personal frame could be no less fascinating than big-picture topics, like politics and business. Relationships, children and women’s interests became legitimate subjects of conversation and life is definitely rounder and warmer as a result. But are we getting too cosy with our sharing of information? As one colleague put it, it’s not what we’re doing that’s the issue, but the fact we’re being judged on it. If we simply spoke about it less, would it help relegate intimate grooming to the category in which it belongs – mere grooming? In other words, do we know too much about what’s going on in each other’s knickers? One thing’s sure: it would be much more difficult to wax lyrical about it if we didn’t.
TELL US WHAT YOU THINK:
Feminist issue or personal choice? Join the debate. Tweet us: @RedMagDaily or @RedBeautyTeam
