Beautifying the bush.
Let’s face it, we’ve become a little lacklustre with our hair down there. Pubes are seen as a monthly annoyance, rather than a fun little accessory. In a world where the permanent laser hair removal market is growing and 57 per cent of women between 18 and 35 chose to go bare, I’ll be the first to say it – we’re facing a pube shortage.
The all-gone, bye-bye Brazilian trend had a swift rise to fame as it took hold of the American market in the late ’90s. In 2002, when veteran waxer Tanya Farrar started her company Brazilian Butterfly, she says Brazilians had a bit of a “seedy undertone” in Australia. She wanted to bring them into the mainstream, and she did (aided by that notorious Sex and the City episode). Soon, her salon was so full she had to think about opening a second.
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These days, she says, everyone wants a Brazilian. But the naked look wasn’t always the star of the show. Throughout her long career, Tanya has experimented with all kinds of techniques to trim the secret garden. From the blitzy to the basic, you best believe there is a huge array of looks out there.
So come one, come all. We can make a change. These days, many of us are embracing our natural bodies, and I think it’s safe to say we all got a little lazy with the razor in the lockdown. So why not jazz it up? To help you out, I’ve compiled a list of ways to get creative with your next downstairs ‘do.
Au natural
Bruno MarsMother Nature
Bikini
This brings us nicely to the aforementioned bikini wax. Maybe you’re a fan of having hair down there, but you don’t want everyone at the beach to be up in your business. Fair enough! This option offers a light trim that just cleans up the edges of your bikini line.
Landing strip
If you just want to dip your toes into the world of pubic hair, this is the best place to start. Everything is removed except for a finger-width strip on the top. I once fraternised with a man who, upon seeing my new landing strip, looked up at me with awe in his eyes and said “You did this… for me?” like I had just given him a key to the city. If that’s not the response you want when someone takes off your pants, then I don’t know what is.
Triangle
The only pube design that gives you the excuse to say “let’s get illumi-naughty tonight”. As with the landing strip, everything is removed except a downward-pointing triangle. It also serves as an arrow, providing a roadmap to potential lovers (as we know they have a tendency to get lost).
Island
I like to think of this as the soul patch of the genitals. It’s a little tuft of hair floating all on its own that says, “I’m down to get funky”. They are typically found at the top of the pubic mound, but hey, feel free to put one wherever you please. It’s your world!
Lighting bolt
This one’s inspired by none other than the legend himself, David Bowie. Tanya reminisces about the good old days in the mid-’00s when her salon offered a service called ‘shapes and colours’. She made various stencils, including one of a lightning bolt, that she used to create intricate waxing designs. Y2K fashion is having a moment, so why not Y2K pubes?
Love heart
Preparing for a romantic rendezvous? Nothing shows your affection better than a little heart. Your pubes should make you feel cute and sexy, like lingerie that stays on. For the strongest effect, pair it with our next option.
Dye job
Hot pink, bleach blonde, electric blue – the options are endless! Channel your inner punk princess, grab a jar of Manic Panic, and be careful to avoid the important bits. I suggest following along with this very informative Wikihow guide. Maybe enlist the assistance of a kind and dedicated friend.
Vajazzle
Dare I say the crown jewel of all pubic designs. The glamour! The elegance! Toss a couple Swarovski crystals down there and violà – vajazzled. Treat your genitals with the respect they deserve. If you’re rocking with a different set of tools down there, don’t feel left out – there’s pejazzling too!
Brazilian Butterfly offered the service in the 2010s but the trend, unfortunately, has since died out. Hopefuls would have a tough time finding a vajazzler in this economy. But Tanya would be open to bringing it back “If the demand was there, sure!”.
This article was originally published on June 1, 2022.
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